Rest

Post 3 until stem cell transplant

Song of the day: Wait for It – Hamilton Musical

Leslie Odom Jr. · Original Broadway Cast of Hamilton

Verse of the day: “take my yoke upon you, and learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.”

Matthew 11:29

Rest. Something the entire world seems to put on the back burner of importance when thinking about their day. Especially in the United States, where productivity for the sake of economic gain and worth is prioritized. Where many of us feel guilty and ashamed if we do not produce or work on something in the span of 24 hours. Where we have to save up vacation days, or have no vacation days. Honestly, I believe that most of America doesn’t know what a true vacation or break or holiday is. It feels cut throat, especially with the ability to carry our work with us anywhere with a wifi connection.

So what happens when you can’t work? When you have to take a break? When you need REST?

This is the dilemma of about 1/3 of Americans who have a disability, mental or physical chronic illness. We cannot prioritize work or productivity. You would think “fake it til you make it” mantra would work for us; it doesn’t. It becomes fake it until you flare so badly you are either forced to rest, have a huge flare up of symptoms, or end up in the hospital. (and now have to hope insurance will cover that hospital stay or have some sort of income ready from all that over working to pay for it).

Rest has always been a hard concept for me to wrap my head around when it comes to being complex autoimmune. Even before my diseases have progressed to palliative care like they are now, I never prioritized rest. I used to be a ballerina, and it was taught that you can always strive for better, be better, do better. It was one more time ten more times only to stand on the side and rehearse even more until class or rehearsal is over. Perfecting any flaws by breaking down movement piece by piece over and over and over again. You never truly take a break from ballet. Until it breaks you.

The same applies to any chronic illness. You never truly get a break from being chronically ill. Sure, there are many treatments that may slow disease progress, minimize symptoms, and sometimes put you in remission. But treatment can only go so far currently. And even with the idea of personalized medication – we are still so far from this. So what do we need to do?

Rest.

Breathe

Take one day at a time. One hour at a time. One minute. One second.

Your health is not worth the societal pressure to constantly be working.

The body can only handle so much.

So, to everyone reading this: find a time in your day to rest. Truly rest. Take a break from the work and any other thoughts of things to do or need to be done. Schedule 5-10 minutes of your day for a break. Take time to nourish your body. Especially if you are chronically ill. Sleep. Take a nap. Take what you need. Cherish yourself enough to WANT to take care of it. You only have one life and one body. There is a time for everything, and that includes rest from the world.

Rest.